Sunday, January 20, 2013

Bebel

Lama tak membebel hihihii. I miss blogging hence I decided to update my blog. hek. Ok I don't know where or how shall I start. I already forgot how to write. yeah. It has been long. Nak bebel pasal kehidupan ni, yeah like I always do. Sometimes I feel like I have no aims in life. I just go and walk through the road already built upon me. I never thought I will do the job I'm doing now. Honestly, still think being a teacher is the best and wise option for me. Tapi tu lah, I have been here, where I am now and it is not easy just to let go everything. Life now is quite cosy and I kinda like it though. But still, it feels like something is missing. I've bought a car recently. Well, it has been 2 months already and it's kinda thrilled to have your own transport which you have aimed long to own. It is now officially the most expensive stuff I own.

Other than that, I really want to go travelling. Sometimes, I am envy with those friends who have travelled to other countries for vacations. I still haven't got the chance !! I have no geng to ajak travel. Sad. Member ramai tapi entah la, I don't know. Susah nak cari yang betul2 satu kepala. I wish somedays, I will manage to travel around the world. Best kalau dapat pergi semua countries and learn something from the visit. I shoud start saving money from now. Honestly, I am quite worried dengan my spending. I spent a lot !! I don't know where the money goes. Nak kata shopping, lite2 je kot. May be sebab pakai kereta sekarang ni. Tapi still, pakai waktu weekend je kot. Hmmm.. entah la, the money just went missing I guess. Boleh buat police report tak?zzzzz.

Ok the last issue is the huge one. Religion. Agama. Aahhhhh. I really want to change for a better person. Tak nak tinggal sembahyang. Nak belajar mengaji. Nak join kelas mengaji/ ceramah etc. But I just don't know where to start. May be kena cari geng dulu kot. Bile dah ade geng, baru la macam semangat kot. Ahhhh. Seriously I'm very worried thinking about this alone. We all gonna die and I still rasa macam gila tak prepare kot nak mati. It makes me worried. Langsung tak de bekal untuk akhirat. Why should I just live kalau tak berubah to be a better person. Ahhhh. It makes me depressed kadang2. I really want to change, but I just can't. Alasan. Uhhhh. I need to attend workshops/ ceramah motivasi etc to boost up my spirit. I need to keep this spirit alive so that I can lead my way to jannah Inshaa Allah. Ya Allah, hinanya lahh aku ni. Layak ke nak masuk syurga mu Ya Allah. Renungan untuk kita semua juga. Salam.